Monday, March 20, 2006

White-hot fury

It's probably a good thing that I didn't post this on Sunday, because that title expresses how I felt.

Before I went to church, Kent said that he was nearly out of cigarettes and that he would have to start using the Commit lozenges. He said it matter-of-factly, and I believed him. I had planned to ask Mom to borrow money, but wanted to wait until the next day so she could check her account and make sure how much money she had.

But that wasn't good enough for him. When the girls and I got home, he started complaining about not having cigarettes and stomped off toward the bedroom with the cordless phone (he was on a phone call - probably with an Internet girlfriend). I tried explaining about waiting til Monday morning, but he acted like I was stupid for even thinking that.

I exploded. I threw the computer chair on the floor, screamed obscenities at him and slammed the bathroom door. I was going to drive right back to town and ask Mom for money for his stinkin' cigarettes, but he ordered me to not drive "his" car. So, fine. It would take forever for me to walk into town and back, as if I was willing to do that.

He went around collecting pop cans and bottles and drove himself into town to redeem them and get cigarettes. He's not cleared to drive after foot surgery a few weeks ago, but that's his problem.

Oh, and get this - he wants a divorce. He claims it's because I told him to kiss my {posterior}. I also told him that our whole household revolves around him - if he wants the computer, he gets it. If he doesn't want to cook, nobody eats (slight exaggeration, but the main reason we buy and eat so much fast food). He smokes four cartons of cigarettes every 2 weeks - imagine what we could do with that money - like fix "his" car, another thing he complained about.

Apparently he's been wanting one for a long time, but he's just hanging around until he gets all his surgeries done under the insurance we have. Then he's leaving. Amanda tells me that he has a "loaded" girlfriend. Yeah, right. If there is a woman crazy enough to take him on, more power to her.

Cayla told me that he said to her that the church is brainwashing her. I wish he would not talk about the church like that. I also wish he would pay as much attention to our daughters as he does to other people's kids. He was bragging the other day that he played spades online with a couple of girls who are ages 13 and 17. They are the daughters of an online friend of his. It's so wonderful that he can take the time to be nice to a couple of strange kids, but can't be bothered to pay attention to his own.